When we moved from a five-bedroom house with a living room, family room, and great room to a one bedroom with living room, it was a lesson in Thing Economics. I went through everything I owned and wondered why in the world I ever thought I’d needed so much. I decided right then it was time to pare down. But how to go about it? Should I toss stuff? Give it away? Sell it? Donate it to a thrift store like Goodwill or Salvation Army?

After all, how many pairs of shoes does one person really need? Okay, okay. We’ll skip that question. LOL

Fun shoes in a rainbow of color

Being the list type, I sat down and sketched out ideas, and ended up using several. Fortunately, I keep those sorts of things, and my notes were handy recently when one of my sisters experienced an apartment fire. No one was hurt, her items were cleaned, and she was moved to a new unit in her apartment building. Still, once she settled in, she had to redecide where to put everything. Both units had the same square footage, but not everything fit the way it had before.

To help her get started, I shared some of my notes, and realized that they would make a good blog article. I say that to say this — getting organized doesn’t always mean throwing everything out. Here are some other ways to get started.

Money makers:

• Yard sale with a family member who has a yard and wouldn’t mind getting rid of things either.
• Post the items on eBay.com “one man’s junk is another man’s treasure” Buyers always pay shipping.

Giveaways:

• Have a family “yard sale” where only family has the choice of what pieces they want. No money has to change hands.
• Post a note on the bulletin board in your subdivision or apartment building that you have xyz free to a good home. Others might love to have it.

Storage:

• A plastic storage container is better than a box because it protects against moisture and insects, and is less likely to crush and damage the contents.
• Start with a medium size box and add another as you fill it up.
• Wrap each piece you want to keep in clean paper (newspaper is okay for non-staining items, but don’t use comic pages or color print ads).
• Place the heaviest items on the bottom and most fragile on top.

Donating:

• Some thrift stores and family agencies will pick up items. Most have limits, so call ahead to find out.
• Ask for a receipt. These are generally blank except for a date and a signature. Write out the kinds of things you donated, and affix a fair-market-value to them if you want to deduct the donation on your taxes. Essentially, use the price you would expect to pay in a resale shop.
• To better understand how to affix a value, go to http://irs.gov and search on the subject “value of donated items” or use this link: http://www.irs.gov/publications/p561/ar02.html#d0e545 Here is the tinyurl for the same spot: http://tinyurl.com/2b7ht6x

Avoiding Junk in the First Place:

As the old saying goes, the best offense is a good defense. Avoid taking home things that will end up being considered clutter. To do that, ask yourself a few questions before taking things home. If the answer to any of the following questions is no or you’re unsure, leave it and move on. Adjust to fit your purpose (for example, if you’re picking out something for someone else).

• Will it add value to my life?
• Can I use it now?
• Will it fit me and do I have items to match it already? (especially clothing)
• Is it my favorite color?
• Is it in good repair?
• Do I want to dust/clean/maintain it regularly?
• Do I know exactly where it will fit in my home/closet?

When I feel overwhelmed by an organization task, I set a timer for ten minutes, and work on only one thing during that time. When the bell rings, I stop and assess what I did. I’m usually pleased with how much I accomplished. I take a five-minute break and then set it for ten more minutes. It’s amazing what you can achieve in ten to twenty minutes. Some days, you may only have time for five minutes, on others, fifteen to thirty. Make it small numbers and you won’t begrudge the time. It takes me just under five minutes to strip the bed and put the sheets in the washer. I can also put away the silverware from the dishwasher in the time it takes to fill a one-gallon pitcher with filtered water at the sink. I try to make it fun, and see how quickly I can do things while something else is happening, like folding towels during commercials on TV, which has the bonus of keeping me from snacking.

As a little girl, I took great joy in playing house. I’d fold and refold, smooth and straighten doll clothes, and make everything just so. My toys weren’t always dolls; I loved playing in the mud too. I realized one day that I’d lost the joy of handling these details, and challenged myself to make work more playful.

It’s surprising how much fun playing house can be. It’s almost as much fun as playing doctor. *wink*

Ask any military family, and they’ll tell you about missed holidays. The first time I decided not to travel home for Christmas after joining the army, my family didn’t know what to do. I’d opted to stay in Germany that year and travel around Europe with my then boyfriend (now my husband) and my future sister in law.

Since that first Christmas, there have been others where I stayed in Texas or Korea or went skiing, but since I’ve had kids, the last five Christmas Days have been memorable, either because of being with the kids or being without them. In 2004, I was a new mom, alone with a colicy baby and a husband who’d gone back to Iraq a few short weeks prior. At 4 am, the baby was awake, so I fed her, then opened presents for her with the dogs to keep us both company.
2005, mommy and daddy were both home and we stayed in Texas, hanging around the house and relaxing.

2006, I was alone again, this time, with a 2 month old and my then 2 year old. Daddy was back in Iraq, so what did Mommy do? We traveled to Maine to spend Christmas with my family. That was the first time my daughter was old enough to remember playing with my neice and they were only 3 days apart in age. They’ve been close since, especially this year, when they went to kindergarten together.

In 2007, we were all back together in Texas once more, but I had to head back to officer training in Georgia shortly after wards.

2008 was probably my worst Christmas. I’ve always been there. Me and the kiddos. Last year, though, was my first one away from my kids and it hit me, hard. There was a sad little tree outside our CHU (containerized housing unit) and someone had hung a few sad little decorations on it. It was as though in the middle of that crappy base, someone was determined to remember what day it was and why it was important.

But to me, diving into work and forgetting about everything at home was the way I coped. I misted up every time someone said Merry Christmas. I didn’t want to see the decorations. I didn’t want to pretend like the holiday mattered to me because without my kids, it didn’t. I know that’s not what Christmas truly is about, but for me, the real pain of missing my children was nothing compared to any notions of the reason for the season.

It hurt. A lot.

So this year, as my husband and I sneak out after the kids go to bed in order to play Santa and Mrs. Claus, I remember what last year was like and what this year is like for hundreds of thousands of families who’s loved ones are deployed during Christmas. And when I find myself getting frustrated with the crowds and the traffic, I remember what last year was like, when there were no crowds and there was no Christmas shopping.

And this year, when I’m hugging my kids and seeing their faces light up and get to hear my daughter singing in the Christmas Eve Mass, I’m going to take a deep breath and remember how lucky and how blessed I truly am. Because this year, more than most, means a lot to me.

I am home and I am grateful.